In June my husband and I will celebrate our 15th wedding anniversary. There will be no new diamond anniversary ring, no public renewal of vows, no obvious sign to the outside world that anything of great importance has occurred.
But we two know. It has taken fifteen years to become the couple we are today. A couple who has known bitter tears, raucous laughs, deep divisions, sublime communions, late night talks and early morning goodbyes. There has been not enough time, not enough money, not enough me to go around and yet... yet... God has filled the gaps, been there for me when my husband could not, been the miraculous money that got us through to the next month, been the third leg of this matrimonial stool. And we plan to celebrate because, to us, something monumental has occurred. Something monumental is occurring everyday in this beautiful, messy mosaic of our marriage. While 15 years may seem a lot to some, in reality, we are still a very young married couple. In trying to summarize what I feel has helped us out so far I created this little acrostic poem:
M ~ make time to talk, to laugh, to be together.
A ~ ask forgiveness and forgive freely.
R ~ rely on God and pray together out loud.
This will transform your married life.
R ~ remind him you love him everyday.
I ~ initiate intimacy.
A ~ argue with dignity.
G ~ guard your words in his presence and out of his presence.
E ~ exalt the best, ignore the rest and pray that he will do the same.
I hope that in ten years, upon our 25th wedding anniversary, I can return to this silly little poem and find that it still describes us, as we once were and as we continue to become.